Sunday, August 01, 2010

Blue

It's been quiet around the Oasis here. Still grieving over Jax, and I wonder if I will ever be completely sure that we did the right thing. I guess that kind of remorse comes with every big decision, no matter which way it goes.

It's a blue funk.

Also, there are the ghosts... expecting to be greeted at the door, mistaking items made of dark fabric for him, checking my chair legs before rolling back.
Just a week after that ordeal, I came down with a cold and was sick for most of the past week. Sick and tired. That sums it up. Time is needed for healing, change, and balance. Life is different now...

Dawes: Give Me Time


Photos: a couple of new murals in the area of Magnolia Cafe, SoCo, artist: Broken Crow

4 comments:

Connie, Orlando said...

I wish there was something I could say or share that would ease your pain & your grief. I understand because I've been through the loss too many times to count. I've come to look at grief as a way of honoring the life lost and an affirmation of how much he/she meant to me. Thinking of you.

Blueberry said...

:-)
Thanks.

I'm really not good with this type of loss, especially since not comforted by kitties being in heaven or at some magical rainbow or looking down on me now or flying with angel wings. It's fine for people who want to believe in an afterlife, but I really don't. My cats' ashes are sprinkled on the earth, just like mine will be, and the memories of others is what lives on... whether in DNA or dreams or conscious thoughts or in stories that are passed along.

That's what I think of the "afterlife."

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

I still wonder if I did the right thing with Annie..wondering if she would have been able to get her bowel function back eventually..you gave jax a wonderful life..he couldn't ask for more than that..sorry my friend, it takes a long time for the pain to go away.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Wishing you heart's ease.