Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Evil pod monsters disguise themselves as bananas.

I took a banana in my lunch today. It was one of this bunch, pictured. Organic. Dole. A little green, mostly yellow. When I tried to peel it, it was nearly impossible! After using all my strength (which isn't very much), I managed to break it in half.

That's when all this sticky stuff oozed out! Pictured is another banana from the same bunch, and the oozy goo that came out when I sliced it. It still looked perfectly good inside so I tried tasting it, that's when I got this awful tree-sap type stuff all over my hands and face! It was hard-core sticky. There was nothing banana-like about this thing except for the appearance.
The thing that made it personal is that some of the goo dripped on my favorite off-white Liz Claiborne jeans... and look at the stains!! The darned things are ruined! I will be pounding the pavement at the Thrifts trying to find another pair that I like as well. What is up with a bunch of evil, insidious banana imposters like that? I think the Rapture Index just went up.


Neil Shakespeare said...

You can't trust fruit. It squirts at the most unexpected times. I think it was invented by clothing retailers.

Blueberry said...

These things should have sported a biohazard sticker. I think that they probably did, and someone switched it with "Dole" in an act of guerilla fruit terrorism. or maybe "gorilla" is more appropriate in this case.